Buying a new car is mostly about emotion, not practicality. The G300 Pro..

Proof of this comes in the form of the new Mercedes G300 Professional. Because nobody in their right minds would buy one, unless they were mentally disturbed or OTT passionate about the G.

When it comes to the G, I admit, I am verging on the mentally unstable. I loved both of those I owned and love this one. But consider this. What do you expect from a 4x4 wagon that requires parting with over R770 000? (Over US$100 000)

Airbags?

“Several of them I would hope.”

A sound system?

“Yes, with multiple speakers and Bluetooth phone kit to begin with.”

What about leather?

“No question.“

Electric windows?

“Yes, stupid. What car doesn’t have them?”

What about carpets?

“Is that a serious question?”

Actually, yes. Would you expect carpets and sound insulation?

“Of course.”

Well I have news for you. Tick nothing for the G300 Pro. From this list, all it comes with is a single airbag in the steering wheel. And nothing else.

To wind up the windows you’ll need big biceps. The raised air intake howls like a lost wolf on the prairie, and the twin single rear seats give about as much support as a tightrope in a storm. The interior is lavish with plain painted steel and the centre console and armrest is made from, what looks like, parts of a railway girder bridge – and it doesn’t even open.

So, if I were to consider this G as a new purchase, having removed any emotion that I may have toward it, it wouldn’t even appear on the short list of 4x4s I might consider. But put the emotion back, and it is a compelling choice.

You see, the G is like a Picasso. It’s nothing to look at until you understand it. It’s so ugly, it’s beautiful, a classic in the best sense. Off road, there is no non-modified 4x4 that comes close. On road, most things are better, but when you put it into the category where it fits best (Land Rover Defender and Toyota 76 Wagon), it out-performs both of them by a long, long way.

But then given the price, it had better.